Suddenly, everyone can’t wait anymore!
What has happened that most of us can’t wait anymore? Why is it that everybody is always rushing? We’ve emerged in a world that is bombarded with information which people want to action immediately. The immediacy propagated by success motivation videos and the Internet has created a pressure to get things done fast.
However, while it is great to get things done quickly, we have thrown away the balance – the place of waiting which comes by sound character values. This has caused students to not want to study hard, but rather depend on examination malpractices; graduates changing their ages just to get jobs or get into business just to be rich early. Why do we not know that life is not fast but in transitions, and a connection of processes that lead to the desired haven?
Why do we not know that life is not fast but in transitions, and a connection of processes that lead to the desired haven?David Adegboyega
If you can’t wait, you can’t be great.
We must raise a generation of people that will learn to wait, and stand up, right. We must let the world know that true greatness comes through waiting which is enabled by sound character. It is while waiting that you learn the wisdom and build the goodwill that makes greatness happen. Greatness is a function of how many people you serve. To serve people requires that you have a solution to what they need; and this solution is not developed in a hurry.
True greatness comes through waiting which is enabled by sound character.David Adegboyega
It takes process. When we don’t want to give the hardwork and ‘hardwait’ required to create a solution that people want, then we really do not want to serve them. The farce called ‘get-rich-quick-n-early’ has brainwashed a generation of young people, making them eager to by-pass the process but get the products of success. But if they can’t wait, they can’t be great. Little wonder we see several abandoned building projects as well as luxury cars in mechanic workshops.
What you get when you wait
When you wait to go through the process, life itself will connect the dots to your greatness. When you wait, you gain sound character strengths. When you wait, you learn patience to see what people need, humility to hear how to solve their problems and perseverance to get to work to create the solution. You learn how to be focused and avoid the pitfalls on the path to greatness.
When you wait, you learn patience to see what people need, humility to hear how to solve their problems and perseverance to get to work to create the solution.David Adegboyega
There is joy in waiting because, the process is more important than the product. When the process is mastered, it keeps reproducing the product. When we learn to wait, we would not want to eat the future today. When we want now what is to be had in the future, we eat the future today and so never get into that future. The mindset of not wanting to wait has led to many broken marriages, ‘uneducated’ graduates, religion without character and near-failed states where basic amenities of life are shamefully absent in the midst of plenty.
There is joy in waiting because, the process is more important than the product.David Adegboyega
To build the nation of our dream, we must teach the current generation, and leave a legacy for the next on waiting. Learn to wait!
Author & Sound Character Coach
It’s a Journey
One of the reasons for life and living is to have a goal, a purpose or an assignment you are working towards. More often than not, when the goal is achieved, right within that achievement, you see another goal to be achieved so you can get to the ultimate definition of your life. What keeps you going on the journey to fulfilment is discipline, which determines your actions or inactions. Our academic courses are also know as disciplines because they contain instructions to tailor us in a defined profession.
What keeps you going on the journey to fulfilment is discipline, which determines your actions or inactions.
To be disciplined, therefore, is to have one’s goal clearly in focus and pursued with determination and meticulousness. As parents, one of our most important assignments is to raise disciplined children. One of the ways to achieve this is by being deliberate in painting to your children a picture of what they should aspire unto. This is the best way to achieve discipline in children because that clear picture of their future makes discipline flow from their inside.
As parents, one of our most important assignments is to raise disciplined children.
Discipline is best Inside-Out
Discipline is better inside-out, than outside in. Outside in could be through punishment or correction; which should be done in a manner to get the child to let discipline flow from their inside. Your goal is to raise children who have imbibed sound character strengths early in life because it makes discipline flow from inside out. Children learn by pictures; in fact, we all never stop learning by pictures because words are pictures.
Therefore, one of the early pictures to paint to our children is that of godly character. They must see themselves in that picture. Of course, this places a demand on parents to be that picture of discipline and excellence. We must have an excellent mind and let this reflect in what we say and do. We must not let our words and actions be conditioned by the needs-driven world we live in. We must comport ourselves in ways that distills discipline to everyone around us. A needs-driven mindset is not patient, it wants whatever it wants now. Products of discipline are not instant; we must raise a citizenry that can wait and give the required discipline to achieve worthwhile goals.
One of the early pictures to paint to our children is that of godly character.
What our Nation will be like with Discipline
Imagine what our nation will be like when we are able to correct the needs-driven mindset that’s making young people impatient to be rich and successful. The truth is people don’t need all they think they need. Having discipline flow from inside out makes you patient to think of what you really need, and focus energy on getting it done. Wanting to do too many things at the same time makes people impatient and lose discipline. We can correct this needs-driven mentality as we raise children that have discipline flowing from inside out.
The truth is people don’t need all they think they need.
Imagine what driving will be like when, for instance, the traffic light is not working but road users pace themselves and wait for others to have the right of way. Just imagine what message has been passed to the children in the vehicles at that time? The traffic light is like the outside influence to get us disciplined. Imagine policy and law makers with this mindset; the mindset of discipline in working for the common good. Sound character strengths have the potentials to transform nations; let’s celebrate it. Let’s give it the pride of place.
Sound character strengths have the potentials to transform nations; let’s celebrate it. Let’s give it the pride of place.
Author & Sound Character Coach
The place to be in life is on the path of Sound Character. One of the foundational character strengths to imbibe is humility. Of course, humility is not about having a low-self esteem neither is it a weakness. In fact, humility is a strength that feeds other desirable attitudes such as tenacity, courage and possibility. Humility is living with the understanding that, at the height of all you know, there is a whole lot you don’t know. It simply puts you in a place where you do not see yourself as more important than others even when you are indisputably the best in that space.
The best leader still has much to learn and so should conduct him not only as a leader but a follower as well. Humility therefore makes you truly great because you learn more, and carry a presence that is endearing. The more humble you are, the more you can learn, the more people you can serve, and invariably the more you grow. Your greatness in life is dependent on how many people you serve.
Taking a Closer Look at You
When you think you are humble, look again! And when we look at ourselves closely enough, we will see moments when we could have been humble. The beautiful thing about humility is that there are always opportunities to be humble. So, where you have acted out of character, you simply make no delay to apologize and course-correct.
It is a beautiful and powerful place to be. Humility is a strength that feeds other desirable attitudes. For instance, when you have a challenging situation at hand and everyone around is taking things badly, this strength will help you listen and engage key stakeholders so you can get to the root of the matter. As you perfect this strength, you will resolve situations without even raising your voice.
A Potent Way to Inspire
To rebuild our nation, we need to inspire a critical mass of people to imbibe sound character. One of the phenomenal ways to inspire people is through humility. When you are humble in relating with people, you show that you appreciate their self-worth. When you show people this degree of appreciation, they open up a space in their hearts to you and the virtues flowing from you can light them up. We have nothing to lose but the world to gain when we live by humility. You may initially come across as weak but a closer interaction reveals the strength you are oozing because of your humility.
Author & Sound Character Coach
Why is the adjective ‘true’ added to success? This is because a lot of things have been attributed as success which truly are not; coupled with the fact that we have emerged into a social media, or better put, “instant media” world. And suddenly, we can’t wait any more. Everything must happen “now!”. Every young person is now concerned with the “end” at the expense of the “means.” Get-rich quick; fame even at the expense of shame; living large and lavish have now become the pursuit of most young people. We need a mass action to change this mindset. We need a mass action for sound character. Any success devoid of sound character is at best a failure. Anything achieved which is not through honesty is not true success. We must change the cliché from “the end justifies the means” to “the end must be justified by a honest means.”
The Disservice of a Warped Meaning of Success
An evident damage has been done to our society by celebrating things that really are “no success”. The “instant success mindset” has reduced the quality of everything we do. The impact can be seen in the four key pillars of society – family, education, religion and the media. For the family unit for instance, the situation where young men think they must attain a level of ‘so-called success’ at any cost so as to impress the would-be wives before getting married, and also where the young ladies are waiting to be impressed with material wealth, sets a wrong success metrics for the family. “Instant success” has led to a collateral damage in education; a situation where a lot of students only think of passing examinations, and not seeking knowledge. The quality of outputs from our pulpits and the media also reflects the disservice that the “instant success” mindset has had on this nation.
Redefining Success for Nigerians
We must inspire the nation Nigeria back to true success. We Nigerians must redefine true success. True success is finding and fulfilling your work i.e. your purpose for living. The ‘things’ that come as a result of fulfilling your work is not the success; success is fulfilling your work on earth. Your work is the value you are to add to the world, the platform for delivering that is sound character. So, more important than a desire for success, should be a desire for work. A mindset to find purpose early in life and pursue it to the point of success should be what parents must work with their children to achieve. The education curriculum must include this; the pulpits must emphasize it while the media must celebrate it. True celebrity is a product of sound character.
Who Gains When Success is Truly Defined
The nation, meaning the people, gains when success is defined in the right context. Success is a function of honest work built on sound character, and nothing else. We need a mass action for sound character, and must employ every pillar of society to achieve this. Everybody gains when everybody lives by sound character.
We must re-define true success!
Author & Sound Character Coach